I have been occasionally asked why I stay single. I honestly don't know. It is simply the status quo.
Single people typically say that their parents have pressured them to try to get married and have children. My parents are gone, and nobody pressures me to do anything regarding my personal life.
Once I did want to find a life partner and consulted with a counselor at the London School of Economics where I was taking a sabbatical. One reason was to satisfy physical desire. "OK, then why don't you sleep with as many men as you like?" she said.
Wow...how different Europe is, I thought. I could not imagine that answer at a Japanese university or American.
"Action speaks louder than words," she continued. "If you have stayed single until now, you have chosen that lifestyle because you like it, whether you consciously notice or not.
Come to think of it, yes, living on my own is comfortable. I can rest whenever I would like. I can choose the exact aroma oil to diffuse in my room without disturbing anybody.
Being "single" does not necessarily mean being lonely. In fact, I have a few gentlemen I see every now and then for different objectives which are legitimate, and it is totally up to me how often I do. I care for them and I enjoy the reciprocal relationship.
During the holiday season, I do feel it would be nice if I can shout "my honey is perfect, blah, blah, blah..." in SNS or Christmas cards. Well, maybe I can do that, but the friendship I enjoy does not fall into the generally perceived happiness that is shaped by the cookie cutter holiday greetings.
